Currently Browsing: Beth Long 17 articles
Teaching Kids to Pause When Angry
David A. Powlison’s book Good and Angry: Redeeming Anger, Irritation, Complaining, and Bitterness suggests that all anger is rooted in selfishness. Selfishness can simply be described by the saying, “I want what I want when I want it.” Anger is born when we do not get what we want. Anger can be both good and […]
Don’t Control, Fix or Avoid
From 2000 to 2016, opioid-related deaths in the U.S. increased by 300%. In contrast, Germany, the 2nd largest opioid prescribing country, did not experience an increase. The huge difference is that Germans believe discomfort is a part of the healing process while Americans believe it should be fully avoided. I believe that the American culture’s […]
Teach Them to… PAUSE
Can you control your thoughts, feelings, and emotions? If you answered “yes”, think again. Adult thoughts, feelings, and emotions come and go as quickly as children when it is time to do chores. We have no control over them. The only thing we can control is our response. Appropriate responses are created when we learn […]
Are You a Lawn Mower Parent?
“Helicopter parents” are becoming obsolete and replaced by “lawn mower parents”. This new breed of parenting style plows ahead of their children, arranging their lives in an attempt to eliminate sorrow, discomfort, and misfortune. “Lawn mower parents” are not preparing their child for the road, they are preparing the road for their child. This style […]
Parent Question: What Do I Do When My Child Lies?
“What do I do when my child lies?” I get this question all the time. Trust me, you are not the only parent struggling with this. This is normal, so don’t question every parenting decision you have ever made when your kid tells a fib. This article highlights the four categories of lies, how to […]
Why Is Communication So Hard (Part 2: Teens)
A wise and heartbroken teen asked, “Who made communication so hard?” She said this after having a difficult week attempting to advocate for herself. As parents of children over the age of 11, our most important role is to model effective and appropriate communication. To do this well, we have to be quiet, be self-aware, […]
Why Is Communication So Hard (Part 2: Ages 7-10)
“Who made communication so hard?” Such a wise question from a child. I simply responded, “Everyone sweet girl, everyone.” Last month, I wrote about how to communicate effectively with children from birth through age 6. This month we will explore how to best communicate with children 7 through 10 years of age. If I could […]
Why Is Communication So Hard? (Part 1)
Steven Covey coined the famous phrase, “The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.” Communication is the number one problem I encounter in family therapy. This obstacle was clearly expressed in a text I received from an exasperated teenage client, “Who made communication so hard?” Such a wise […]
Appreciating Your Kids (While They Are Still Kids)
Recently my husband and I have become empty nesters! We love our children and love being parents, but raising them has been exhausting. We’ve been looking forward to the “empty nest” phase for a long time and we are not disappointed. However, we have both been surprised at the unique perspective this phase of life […]
Embrace the Challenges
A few months ago, I was giving an IQ test to an adorable little boy. As the questions became more difficult, he looked at me and said, “This is challenging. I love a good challenge.” His reaction was so different. Typically, children become frustrated when it gets too hard or they give a whiney variation […]